Is He The One?

Posted on March 26, 2013 by theveilofchastity

I will be taking a break from blogging this week due to Holy Week, Good Friday and Easter. For the same holy reason, Jen will not be hosting her 7 Quick Takes Friday link-up on Good Friday.

I have been receiving a number of detailed emails from you asking this question: Is he the one?

I have also been asked how I can have such a “broad brush” opinion about what a real Holy Spouse looks (and acts) like versus a guy who is not the one. My post next week will address these legitimate questions. I say they are legitimate because I had the same questions when I was single!

Is he the one?
How will I know?
Is he just not ready?
Why do I feel disappointed with his pursuit of me?

In response to these legitimate questions, please check back for next week’s post: He Is Not The One

In the meantime, I have categorized my past posts on the side bar to the right of the blog hoping it will help those of you who are searching around the blog. The categories are:

Myths That Singles Must Resist (especially this one)
The Inside Scoop On Him (especially this one)
Top Posts (especially this one)

Please keep your emails coming. I love the dialogue and getting to know you better. I also enjoy adding your names to my Divine Mercy Chaplet prayer list.

May you have a blessed Holy Week and a glorious Easter. He is Risen, Alleluia!

God love you and bless you!

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7 Quick Takes Friday ~ Vol 22

Posted on March 22, 2013 by theveilofchastity

— 1 —

This week’s post: For all of us who have asked this question: Dear God, What do You want from me? May you be blessed!

— 2 —

Spotlight on Maura Byrne: Maura was our guest speaker during our County Youth Day this past weekend! Maura has a fast growing apostolate called Made In His Image. As promised during my 7QTs last week, I am reporting back and putting the spotlight on her! Here is a little bit about Maura:

“Maura has an immense yearning to inspire others to choose to see beauty in their suffering and in the ambiguity of life. It is her desire to use her story, to foster hope and healing in the lives of all she encounters. Maura is dedicated to educating women about their inherent dignity as daughters of God, created in His image and likeness and the love of God the Father.”

She is wonderfully gifted! She is compassionate! She is Catholic!

— 3 —

She Is Wonderfully Gifted: Her audience consisted of 6^th, 7^th and 8^th grade girls. It is a long story but we had to redirect her talk from a ‘Chastity‘ talk to a ‘Modesty, Sacramental, Become a Saint’ talk at the last-minute. When she accepted our invitation to speak 4 months ago, she was told that it was a Chastity talk and to “talk about whatever you want.” The organizers realized the night before Maura was about to get on the airplane that the parents of the middle school girls had not been notified that it was a “Chastity” talk and therefore we had to ask her to revamp her presentation!

As you can imagine, it was a little stressful. But, she knocked it out of the park!!! She hit every talking point we requested and most importantly, kept their attention the whole time. This age group has about a 25 minute attention span, however, after about an hour, we had to wave Maura off the stage because the talk was going so well! She captured their attention and their hearts.

— 4 —

She is compassionate: Maura has been through a lot and is an inspiring example of a healthy survivor. I feel certain the girls in the audience knew that Maura understands their struggles. She initiated a discussion about how the media portrays us women versus how God views us. The girls quickly and easily named every falsehood and media must be’s: skinny; perfect skin, teeth, hair and make-up; ‘full’ in certain areas; dress in the latest style. Maura understands that these girls (as young as 11 years old) are under pressure to be perfect. She conveyed to them that the idea that we need to be perfect is a lie and that our worth is from our Father in heaven because we are made in His image and likeness.

She also talked to them a bit about how hurtful our words can be. We as women can sometimes have the most biting comments towards other females. She encouraged them to watch their words. Overall, Maura was able to convince them that she understands the questions these young girls are dealing with: Who am I? What is my purpose? Who are You, God? Do I matter? Am I enough?

— 5 —

She is Catholic: After college Maura worked for Varsity Catholic, which is a subdivision of FOCUS (Fellowship of Catholic University Students). She worked as a Catholic missionary to bring the love of the Gospel to student-athletes on college campuses. She completed a mission trip to Kolkata, India to serve with the Missionaries of Charity. She loves the Sacraments and the Rosary and Mary and Eucharistic Adoration. She believes in the healing power of Confession.

Please do yourself a favor and beg your Youth Minister to invite Maura to talk to the girls in your school or Parish! We have these young, talented, on-fire-for-the-Lord-and-His-Church, Catholic speakers who have given up the comfort, security and stability of the corporate world to be Disciples of our Lord. Sure, they cost money but you have to remember that they have car payments and need health insurance too. Those things cost money! Let’s support them. The value of their impact on the lives of our young Catholics makes them worth every penny.

Thank you, Maura! We loved having you here and it was an honor to meet you!

— 6 —

Beautiful Susanna and the Lusting Peekers

Old Testament Reading: Did you happen to notice the Old Testament reading from Monday’s Mass? It was from the Book of Daniel, Chapter 13. You know how sometimes you hear scripture and you say, “Hey, I never heard that before!”

The story is about Susanna, “a woman of great beauty” (and a God-fearing woman) and how Daniel saved her from being executed for adultery. See, these two judges (who fell into lust) were peeking at Susanna while she was bathing and tried to trick her. They said, “…give in to our desire, and lie with us and if you refuse, we will testify against you that you dismissed your maids because a young man was here with you.” Susanna refused (again, a God-fearing woman) and they testified against her.

She was about to be executed and (here comes the good part!) “God stirred up the Holy Spirit of a young boy named Daniel.” Daniel separated the two judges and asked them to describe the tree in which the alleged adultery took place. One judge said, “mastic” and the other one said, “oak.” Busted!

How many times does God try to “stir up the Holy Spirit” in us? Imagine the impact we could have in His name! Come Holy Spirit!

— 7 —

My Dream Come True: Well sort of. I don’t watch a lot of TV but……have I mentioned how much I love Marcus Grodi’s show, The Journey Home? The problem is that his weekly show and The Best of The Journey Home are only on a couple of times a week. Well, I knew that there were all these YouTube videos of the shows that I could watch but I did not want to sit at my computer to watch them. I wanted to sit on my comfy couch next to my sweet man and watch them. So, Gregg listened to my plea and of course he found a solution. I am not certain how he did it but after purchasing and installing an $80 device, we can now watch YouTube videos on our TV while sitting on our comfy couch. Gregg is awesome.

God love and bless you!

If you have enjoyed my blog, please “like” my Facebook Page, The Veil and sign up to receive my blog posts automatically by clicking the rectangular “Follow” button. Thank you!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary! We are praying for you and your little baby, Jennifer!

Dear God: What do you want from me?

Posted on March 20, 2013 by theveilofchastity

Maura Byrne from Made In His Image spoke to about 100 middle school girls this past weekend during our County Youth Day. She was fantastic! If you can convince your school or parish to have Maura come and talk with your girls about Modesty and Chastity, do it!

I was reminded during Maura’s talk that it is a blessing to be broken and sifted. It forces us to ask the question “God, what do you want from me?” Some of us ask this question at an earlier age than others, some never ask the question at all and sometimes the question looks more like this:

“God!! What in the world do you want from me?!?!”

Silence

“When you are going through something hard and wonder where God is, remember the teacher is always quiet during the test.”

Author Unknown

When I was single, I asked that question of God and was met with silence every time. He let me wrestle with Him all the while not saying a word. Silence. It would have been a lot easier if He had given me a list of answers consisting of ‘do this and don’t do that.’ But, all I received was silence.

His silence exasperated me and made my face and eyes burn with tears of frustration. He held His ground. I accused Him of being unfair and of not really caring about me. He was immovable.

Gradually, I received the gift of brokeness. I had no one else and nothing else to turn to. He was my only hope.

Deep down, I already knew what I needed to do and what I needed to stop doing. But there is a difference between knowing and understanding. I wanted to understand why. I wanted to understand what difference it would make in my life if I followed His precepts and commands.

Joy, Pure, Light

“The precepts of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart; The commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes.”

Psalm 19:8

So, I went to His word. I studied the scriptures. I studied the writings of the Saints. I prayed. I started living a Sacramental life. I started giving my time, talent and treasure to the Church. I sat in His presence in silence during Eucharistic Adoration. I studied all I could about the wisdom of Chastity and committed to it sincerely. Then, I closed my eyes and persevered through the next 10 years. Once I was following His precepts, I was able to see and understand what He wanted from me: Relationship

Sifted

“…it was in these matters of the heart that my own heart was sifted and scoured and exposed, the process of purifying begun.”

Elisabeth Elliot, Passion and Purity

Through the process of not receiving what I wanted, I was sifted. The things I wanted God to deliver to me (marriage, children) had to be put on the altar. I had to trust that no matter what the future holds for me, our relationship is the one thing I could not live without. Our relationship kept that little itty bitty flicker of hope alive in me and kept me going.

Trust

“…the bringing of our unruly wills and affections into order will cost us something.”

Elisabeth Elliot, Passion and Purity

I am not sure that God “withholds” marriage from us in order to break and sift us. Delayed and missed marriages are happening for a variety of reasons but are mostly tied to the culture (contraception, fornication,abortion) in which we are living. Either way, I think He can use just about anything to get our attention. For me, withholding marriage was the best method.

Are you being sifted? Keep following His precepts. Are you wondering what God wants from you? He wants relationship. A relationship of dependency, trust, proper worship and love. Are you running low on hope? Trust Him, worship Him, love Him, wait on Him.

I know it is hard. You remain in my prayers. God love and bless you.

p.s. Recommended reading: Elisabeth Elliot, Passion and Purity

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7 Quick Takes Friday ~ Vol 21

Posted on March 15, 2013 by theveilofchastity

— 1 —

This week’s post: The idea of writing a post specifically for Teens has been on my mind for a while. Recently, several parents have asked me what I think is the best approach for reaching teens with the wisdom and power of Chastity. I believe Teens are a tough crowd because they lack perspective (not their fault). I imagine that whatever I say will be met with skepticism because they have not yet experienced enough of life to be able to apply the message.

I fear they will look at me and think I know not of what I speak because I have not been a teenager for quite some time. I am easily old enough to be their mother. I think they would have a hard time relating to me and honestly, I might have a hard time relating to them. The pressures today seem much more intense than when I was a teen.

But, one thing I believe is that because of the way God designed us, the longings of the human heart stay constant. In the same way, Satan’s ‘bag of tricks’ contains nothing new. Although his tricks may be better supported by today’s culture, they still amount to the same old, same old (doubt, envy, need for attention and affection, body image distortion, immodesty, pride).

If you are a Teen or a Mom with a Teen, please let me know what you think. Here is the post: Dear Teenage Girl

— 2 —

Pope Francis: Wow, I thought I was a minimalist! Pope Francis takes the bus, cooks his own food and insists on living in a modest dwelling. He even washes and kisses the feet of AIDS patients!

In a word, he seems detached from the world and all its trappings of power, comfort and prestige. I don’t think Pope Francis is going to be easily pushed around. I mean, what method would one possibly use to try to persuade him to go against his conscience? You can’t take away his car. He takes the bus!

I am trying not to go overboard on the ‘Pope love’ because honestly I don’t know much about him. The Holy Spirit picked him and that is good enough for me. But, so far, I see so much potential. He is already shaking up the definition of social justice and extracting the misplaced liberal theology that has infected some segments of Catholic teaching. I can see him infusing the truths of marriage, life and the Priesthood into their proper place and zapping any notion that equality and charity can be confused with same-sex marriage, contraception, abortion and women/married priests.

I also think that Materialism, Instant Gratification and their sister Relativism are shaking in their boots.

Bravo, Holy Spirit, bravo!

— 3 —

Maura Byrne: Speaking of Teens, our county will be having their County Youth Day this weekend! Our guest speaker is Maura Byrnes from Made In His Image. I am very excited! I will report back next week!

— 4 —

Spotlight On: This week’s “Spotlight On” segment features 2 bloggers! The first is Regina (affectionately known as Number 9) from Catholic Alcoholic blog. I just loved this blog post.

The second is Sarah Babbs from Fumbling Toward Grace. She wrote an amazing article called “ Undoing Our Addictions During Lent”. And this post which made me cry.

— 5 —

Sunday’s Gospel: As we stood for the Gospel last Sunday, a boy about the age of 6 reached his arms up to his Dad and his Father picked him up. The boy wrapped his arms around his Dad’s neck and snuggled into his Dad’s neck. Yes, the boy was a little old for it but my immediate thought was, “Oh someday that Father will long for these days because that boy may become the prodigal son.”

Then I thought of my own parents and how they had to deal with my time away from my Catholic faith. My haughty attitude must have been excruciating for them to put up with as I declared that I had “become a Christian” and had been “saved.” (ugh) The truth was that I was away from home just like the son in the parable. I was lost and needed to be found.

That was a long time ago but because I am now a parent, the pain and betrayal that they must have felt is very real to me.

I am so sorry, Mom and Dad. Thank you for the gift of the deposit of Faith and for your faithful prayers.

— 6 —

The Eucharist: I went to the best talk tonight on the Eucharist given by Father Larry Swink! Wow, just Wow! He was passionate about the fact that the Eucharist is Jesus and therefore we should change as a result of receiving Jesus. Amen!

He guaranteed us parents that if our children received the Eucharist every week then the moral evils awaiting them in this world will flee from them. Awesome!

— 7 —

Gungor: Did you read about Gungor, the Evangelical Protestant musician, this week? He was performing at a Catholic Youth Festival in Louisiana and witnessed Eucharistic Adoration for the first time. You can read about his experience here and here! These are the quotes the everyone was talking about:

“Honestly, it made me want to be Catholic again…..It was Heaven crashing into earth.”

Many young Catholic on-fire-for-the-Lord-and-His-Church bloggers reached out to Gungor and invited him to continue on his journey to the fullness of the Faith. And Gungor responded graciously to their invitation to discuss our faith over a beer. I even reached out to Gungor on twitter and thought I was super cool. But, you young Catholics are so far ahead of where I was at your age. You are amazing. Thank you!

Rise Up Young Church!

God love and bless you!

If you have enjoyed my blog, please “like” my Facebook Page, The Veil and sign up to receive my blog posts automatically by clicking the rectangular “Follow” button. Thank you!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary! We are praying for you and your little baby, Jennifer!

Dear Teenage Girl

Posted on March 13, 2013 by theveilofchastity

Dear Teenage Girl,

I have been asked several times recently how to ‘reach you’ with the wisdom and power of Chastity. Each time, my response has been “I am not quite sure.” You already know that you can get pregnant and/or an STD from sex. But, these facts are not very convincing when you are in the heat of the moment.

“Deep within yourself listen to your conscience which
calls you to be pure. … Passing encounters are
only a caricature of love, they injure hearts and mock Gods plan.”

Blessed Pope John Paul II

I also will never tell a girl that she will be damaged in some way if she does have sex outside of marriage. Although unchaste behavior does injure our relationship with ourselves and with God, that message is just not very loving. So, how do we reach you with the Truth?

I am going to try to draw a picture for you. No, actually several pictures. The first is a picture of your future which I will draw from the deepest desires of your heart. The second is a picture of how you are designed (biologically, emotionally, spiritually and physically). And the third picture will help you connect the first and second picture.

The First Picture

I don’t think your exact age right now really matters. You could be 12, 14 or 18 years old and I think this first picture will look familiar to you. It is a picture of the future you are hoping to have. It includes love, trust, family, life and faith. Do you know why I believe this? Because logically I don’t think anyone hopes for hate, betrayal, being alone, death and doubt.

So, close your eyes and picture your future painted from the desires of your heart. It includes a husband, right? And children, right? This is normal. This is healthy. God put those desires there for a reason. The picture you painted of your future is beautiful.

“Be sober, be watchful! For your adversary, the devil, as a roaring lion, goes about seeking someone to devour.”

1st Peter 5:8

Keep that picture in the front of your mind as you navigate through the next 10 or so years because you will be challenged. Hatred, betrayal, loneliness, death and doubt stand ready to enter your life.

The Second Picture

Wow, that last sentence was quite a Debbie Downer statement wasn’t it? I included it because I think you are old enough to hear the Truth.

There are tripping hazards in your future and you need to know about them. In order to see and avoid these tripping hazards, you need to first understand how you are designed; how we are all designed. So let me paint the second picture for you.

You have a body and a soul. This is true whether you are a Catholic or an atheist, male or female. If you are a human person, you have a body and a soul. In order to accept the gifts of love, trust, family, life and faith, your body and your soul must be in harmony with each other. Your body and soul cannot be significantly disconnected.

“In the absence of chastity, a person is easily seduced into doing things that are beneath his dignity, things that are shameful, things that do not accord with who he truly is”

Angelic Warfare Confraternity

Here are the things that disconnect your body and your soul:

1. sex outside marriage 2. allowing anyone to use your body 3. doing things that are beneath your dignity 4. contraception 5. immodest dress 6. immodest language and 7. entertainment and media which glorifies the 6 prior things listed

Chastity is a powerful virtue and is required in order to keep your body and your soul in harmony. Chastity, simply put, includes saving sex for marriage and remaining open to life within marriage (not contracepting). When contraception is used, it is a violation of our design and dignity and it is a violation of the virtue of Chastity.

Contraception. Oh, yes, I went there. As a teen, you will most likely be tempted and maybe even pressured to go on the pill. It would be better for you, precious teenage girl, to create a child in the heat of the moment than it would to be on birth control and get used by boys/men for the next 10 or 20 years.

It is very hard to admit to ourselves when we are being used. We want to believe that the boy we are intimate with is not using us, that he loves us and that we have a future with him. But, as Blessed Pope John Paul II stated, these are “passing encounters” and are “only caricatures of love.” “Deep within yourself”, you know this. And, I am so sorry to inform you, so does everyone else.

Even if you do not believe you are being used, you need to know that sex is designed to create babies within the Sacrament of Matrimony. When you disconnect sex and babies and sex and matrimony, you disconnect your body and our soul. So please avoid this tripping hazard so you can accept the good gifts that God has for you!

The Third Picture

“Delight yourself in the LORD; And He will give you the desires of your heart.”

Psalm 37:4

I have wonderful news for you! God knows who your husband is! So, doesn’t it make sense for you to stay close to the One that has the inside scoop on your future? Stay close to Him in the Sacraments (Confession and the Holy Eucharist received at Mass), in prayer, Eucharistic Adoration and in Sacred Scripture. The grace from the Sacraments and this closeness with God will strengthen you in your commitment to Chastity.

“Either God or Satan is in the bridal chamber.”

Alice von Hildebrand, Man and Woman: A Divine Invention

Chastity is a life-long virtue (not just a teen virtue). It means to honor our bodies by protecting the holiness of the marital embrace (the Holy of Holies). Sex is only for marriage and we must remain open to life if we want to enjoy this closeness with God.

The Veil

I sincerely remember being a teenager. We want love and affirmation. We believe every other girl our age has a perfect life. We experience rejection. This desire for love and affection as well as the hurt of envy and rejection are not limited to your teenage years so you might as well strengthen yourself as soon as you can! How?

“…Behind the second veil there was a tabernacle which is called the Holy of Holies…” Hebrews 9:4

“…the veil shall serve for you as a partition between the holy place and the Holy of Holies…” Exodus 20:33

If I could transport myself back to my teen years, it would help to know that I was covered by a veil. Please go here to read about The Veil and Superabundance. Although the veil is just a metaphor, I think you can follow the concept. God knows who your husband is and He will arrange your marriage if you stay close to Him and commit to chastity. Because you are covered by a veil, only your husband will be able to ‘see’ you. All other guys will, thankfully, reject you. This will be frustrating and painful but oh so rewarding when you realize that, in your husband’s eyes, you are the girl of his dreams.

As it instructs us in sacred scripture, be ‘asleep’ in the will of God and do not ‘stir things up’ until the Lord says it is time.

“I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem, that you not stir up, nor
awaken my love, until it pleases.”
Song of Songs 8:4

Hold on to these pictures, dear Teenage Girl! Remain chaste. Remain asleep and refrain from stirring. Hope in the Lord. Wait on Him.

God love and bless you!

7 Quick Takes Friday ~ Vol 20

Posted on March 8, 2013 by theveilofchastity

— 1 —

This week’s post: My guest blogger this week is….Gregg! He shares his perspective on “Attraction” and includes insights on the following: Trust, True Beauty, Don’t Be Hot, What is Wrong With Men?, Where Is My Husband? and The Veil

May you be encouraged and blessed!

— 2 —

Liebster Award: As you may have read in my other post this week, C.C. from Sacred Sharings For The Soul nominated me for the Liebster Award! This award started in Germany and the goal is to recognize other bloggers. It is sort of like a chain letter which is funny because I always broke the chain with actual chain letters (remember them?). But, I was more than happy to participate and then nominate Kalondu, Jeannine, Laura and Amanda (who is receiving the award for a….3^rd time!) Congratulations to you all!

Here is a song for you, C.C (which is the song Gregg and I played at the end of our wedding reception to thank our family and friends):

Thank You by Natalie Merchant

— 3 —

Holy Name of Mary Secondary School: A big shout out to the 9^th and 10^th graders from Holy Name of Mary Secondary School! C.C. from Sacred Sharings For The Soul spoke to them this week about the powerful virtue of Chastity. Awesome!!

— 4 —

Spotlight On: Each week I am spotlighting a fellow blogger. This week, Jeannine from Grace and Peace caught my attention with her 7QTs. Jeannine shared about a book called, “Wonder” which she and her 12-year-old son recently read. Because my son loves to read and I want him to be reading good things, I put the book in my Amazon shopping cart. I can’t wait to read it!

I really like Jeannine’s blog because she discusses the challenges of Fatherlessness and provides the hope found in our true Father.

Thank you, Jeannine!

— 5 —

Sunday’s Readings: How about the stern warnings against pride and presumption revealed in Sunday’s readings? Yikes. I am not sure how the false teaching of “once saved, always saved” can ever survive given these words from sacred scripture:

“Therefore, whoever thinks he is standing secure should take care not to fall.” 1 Corinthians 10:12

“But I tell you, if you do not repent, you will all perish as they did.” said Jesus in the Holy Gospel according to St. Luke, Chapter 13

— 6 —

Rosary With The Cardinals: I was home Wednesday from work and had the privilege of participating in and praying the Holy Rosary with the Cardinals during their prayer service and Eucharistic Adoration in Rome. Come Holy Spirit! Enkindle in us the fire of Your love!

— 7 —

Silliness: I don’t even know who Chelsea Handler is but she felt the need to say this about Taylor Swift:

“My theory about Taylor Swift is that she’s a virgin, that everyone breaks up with her because they date her for two weeks and she’s like, ‘I’m not gonna do it,'” continued Handler, who once penned a book called “My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One-Night Stands.” “And they’re like, ‘Oh, well, forget it. Then I don’t want to date you.’ Every guy thinks they’re going to devirginize her, and they’re not. She’s never going to get devirginized, ever, ever, ever, ever.”

I will encourage you, dear Chelsea, with this:

“Often times Chastity is resented by those souls not wanting to do the work and make the sacrifices that are necessary to grow in virtue— any discussion of the virtues can be like a mirror showing them their own moral laziness.”

Blessed Pope John Paul II

God love and bless you!

If you have enjoyed my blog, please “like” my Facebook Page, The Veil and sign up to receive my blog posts automatically by clicking the rectangular “Follow” button. Thank you and God Bless!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary! We are praying for you and your little baby, Jennifer!

A Man’s Perspective on ‘Attraction’

Posted on March 6, 2013 by theveilofchastity

Trust

“In chaste, committed sexual love, I put my emotional center — I put myself — in the care of another. We are made free so that we can freely dispose of ourselves as a gift to the other.”

The Truth of Catholicism by George Weigel

I would love to tell you that I found the above quote by George Weigel but the truth is my wife found it and added it. However, I will say that I agree with it 100%! Most men (who are thinking about marriage) want to marry a girl they can trust. By the time Cindy and I met at age 37, I doubted I would meet and marry a nice, trustworthy, faithful Catholic girl who was also, to me, very physically attractive.

But once I met Cindy, I changed… I saw something in her eyes and it caused me to pause. This part is hard to describe so I will just say that she had an almost immediate effect on me. We spent the next 3 days sightseeing and enjoying each other’s company and I fell in love.

True Beauty

What I saw in Cindy’s eyes was her true beauty. I believe that her soul and her heart were revealed to me. I was scared and even a little sad at first. I began to realize that here in front of me was a woman I didn’t deserve! She was so good and I was, well, not so deserving. Then I remembered what I had prayed for. I had always asked God to send me a good holy woman who believed what I believed and that just made her even more attractive!

“…Why does it matter? What does last? – Who you are on the inside. But the crazy part is it doesn’t stop there, because once people know who you are on the inside, that’s what they start to see on the outside too. From my own experience, and from talking to a lot of guys, I can tell you that a girl’s appearance changes, sometimes drastically, as you get to know her. I’ve known any number of girls who, at a glance possessed only average looks, but who, as I got to know the delightful people that they were, actually changed before my eyes to become very attractive (it also goes the other way, but I won’t talk about those girls)….”

Guys On Modesty ‘A Women’s Heart and Beauty‘ November 8, 2012

I would love to say I found the above post by guysonmodesty.com too BUT, once again, my lovely wife gets the credit. Just like the first quote, I agree 100%! I can tell you that I was completely attracted to Cindy’s commitment to go to Mass together and I loved the fact that we could worship Our Lord as a couple.

Also, I truly respected her condition that I stay in a hotel the entire time I was in town! This led to my complete commitment to try to be deserving. It raised the bar in my mind that I would have to really put effort into this relationship if I might make myself worthy of being with this wonderful woman!

From a guy’s perspective, that type of spiritual strength and virtue can significantly enhance a woman’s physical appearance. I will also say that a physically attractive girl can sadly become unattractive when the spiritual aspect of her personality is lacking.

Don’t Be Hot

You do not have to be what the world describes as “hot.” Please do not strive for this. Instead, just do your best to take care of and enhance your physical attributes. Your love for the Lord and your commitment to Him will seriously multiply your attractiveness in the eyes of the man who God has for you. And when you add Chastity to the equation, the trust and attraction factor will increase beyond your imagination.

What Is Wrong With Men?

There are still plenty of men out there looking for these traits but alas they are afraid to express this loudly for fear of being taunted by their peers. I had friends that would tease me for saying the honest truth that I did not want to “hook up” but that I wanted to meet someone I could marry. Well, this went on for seven years until I met my beloved.

Some men are really stuck and can’t seem to move beyond their base desires. These men who still value the hot, sexually available girls are not fit for marriage. They seem to be immature and have fallen for the idea that secular media has sold to them. They think that it is more important that a woman be beautiful in the world’s eyes instead of in God’s eyes. You don’t want those men. The “sudden vacuum” which Cindy described a couple of weeks ago is inevitable.

I understand that these men who are stuck in this immature lifestyle can be discouraging for you girls to witness. But, I want to encourage you with this: Please don’t underestimate the number of men who are hoping to find you.

When I was single, I begged God to help me find a girl like Cindy. I felt very discouraged and just did not think it was possible. I had to wait for God to work it all out (seven years). I think there are a lot of men out there experiencing the same doubt and discouragement so please start praying for your husband. He can use your prayers, believe me.

Where Is Your Husband?

You may be wondering why in the world you are single given the fact that you are taking care of yourself physically and spiritually. Where are all the guys who supposedly need you; a nice, trustworthy, Catholic girl? Where is your husband?

This is where I would suggest looking in all the “right” places. Maybe decide to try a good Catholic singles website. You may be surprised how many single Catholic guys are out there! Also, you may consider attending a church bible study or get involved with a parish youth group. I know of a couple fantastic single men at our parish who serve the church as a youth minister and a CCD teacher, for example. These guys are around and they are using their time and talent to serve the Church. Run towards Christ and then look around to see who’s running with you!

I honestly don’t know where your husband is but God does. I can assure you that once your future husband meets you, he will value you. He will thank the Lord for you every day. He will know he has found a precious wife and that he needs to spend the rest of his life proving he is worthy of you.

The Veil

As Cindy always says, “Remember you are covered by a veil! He can’t see you. But the man who God has for you will be able to see you. And, he will like what he sees!”

God bless all you beautiful Chastity girls!

Gregg

Wow, The Liebster Award!

Posted on March 3, 2013 by theveilofchastity

I am very excited about being nominated for the Liebster Award by C.C. from Sacred Sharings For The Soul!

The Liebster Award originated in Germany and its focus is to showcase other bloggers. The word “Liebster” is German for “dear” or “beloved,” so these awards are geared towards highlighting other people’s blogs that you like to read and helping others discover them. Thanks so much for thinking of me, C.C.!

While the award calls for 9 nominees, like C.C., I will keep things simple and only choose 4. Below I will respond to questions that C.C. asked, share 11 facts about myself and provide 11 questions for my nominees. Here we go!

1) Where do you find the most peace? This isn’t going to sound super spiritual but I feel the most peace at night, lights out and when I am just about to fall asleep. The song by No Doubt called ‘Underneath It All’ has a line (which I love) that says, “You give me the most gorgeous sleep I’ve ever had.” A great marriage = gorgeous sleep.

2) What is your favorite childhood memory? When I was about 10 years old, I was voted to be an “All Star” in the end-of-year softball tournament. I was playing the left field position when this line drive came flying up the 3^rd base line. I ran, dove and caught it! Everyone cheered and talked about it afterwards. Now, anyone who knows me is going to be shocked by this story because I am neither nimble nor athletic anymore. The reason I was an “All Star” is because I had an early growth spurt as a child. I was one of the tallest 10 year olds in the league. But, unlike the rest of the girls, I have not grown one inch since I was 10. Soooo, my intimidating height was…wait for it….short lived. 🙂

3) Who is your favorite Saint? St Thomas Aquinas!

4) What is your favorite book on Spirituality/Saints? Trustful Surrender to Divine Providence: The Secret of Peace and Happiness by Father Jean Baptiste Saint-Jure

5) If you could visit one country where would you go? Italy!

6) Who is your biggest mentor? My Mom!

7) Do you have a favorite prayer? Prayer time? Divine Mercy Chaplet! I have a little exercise program I do when I get to work that takes about 10 minutes. I walk the stairs in our building and say my morning prayers. It is a great way to start the day and can be accomplished while my computer warms up!

8) What is your favorite food? Vanilla Chocolate Chip Ice Cream. I always feel horrible after eating it because I get all sinus-y from the dairy. So, it is a rare pleasure.

9) What is most misunderstood about you? That I am a “career” woman.

10) If you could have coffee/tea with one person who would it be? Alice von Hildebrand!

11) What is your pet peeve? Oh, I have so many! Noises like whistling and loud TV; an entitlement mentality in anyone; know-it-alls; crumbs on the counter; anything on the counter that doesn’t belong on the counter. Yes, you can feel sorry for Gregg!

11 Facts About Me:

1. I wear one contact.

2. I am the youngest of 4 children.

3. I am a Mechanical Engineer.

4. I am addicted to my hand-held free cell solitaire game.

5. My favorite laundry detergent is Gain.

6. I have flown in a military helicopter.

7. I sit in an ergonomic chair at work and at home.

8. I can hula hoop for 30 minutes.

9. I have strange eating habits and my husband hardly notices anymore.

10. I wear clogs with most of my non-Summer outfits.

11. I had a terrible ski accident when I was 30 years old that I remember nothing about.

Liebster Nominee Questions for:

Laura Kalondu Jeannine Amanda (nominated for the 3rd time!)

How did your husband propose? Or if you are not married, what is your dream proposal?
Is your refrigerator door clear or do you have stuff on it?
Which Person of the Holy Trinity do you feel closest to: Father, Son or Holy Spirit?
What is your favorite restaurant?
If you wrote a book, what title would you choose? Fiction or Non-Fiction?
Are you a convert or a revert?
Which is your favorite Liturgical Season?
How do you overcome writer’s block?
What is your favorite Scripture passage?
What do you wear with jeans: boots, heels, flats or clogs?
Which blog post was the most difficult one for you to write? (please add link)

You are my Liebster Nominees! Please respond to my questions, share 11 facts about yourself and then create 11 questions for your Liebster Nominees. Thank you for taking the time to respond! 🙂 I can’t wait to read your answers and get to know you better!

7 Quick Takes Friday ~ Vol 19

Posted on March 1, 2013 by theveilofchastity

— 1 —

This week’s post: Unless our bodies and our souls are harmonized, it is impossible for us to relate to the opposite sex! As promised, this week’s post provides insight and suggestions on how to merge and reharmonize your body and your soul. May you be blessed!

— 2 —

First Reconciliation Report: Hallelujah! Our son’s First Reconciliation was awesome! As we were leaving the church, he did one of those “yee haw” side kicks. Then, we all went out to lunch to celebrate.

He is like a new man. I am serious! All week he has been a little more obedient and mature. Anyone else notice such an obvious work of grace in their child upon receiving this wonderful Sacrament?

Our church encourages Parents to also go to confession while their children are receiving their “Second Sacrament.” So while Gregg was overseeing, encouraging and coaching our son (Gregg is so awesome), I went to Confession. There was another Dad in line in front of me who was in the confessional for quite some time, praise God! I was expecting him to come out sort of hanging his head or with a stressful expression on his face. But, no! He had a little ‘giddy up’ in his step and a smile on his face. Like a prisoner set free! Isn’t that what we are, praise the Lord?

I was grateful for the extra time to examine my conscience because it allowed things to surface that felt really good to confess. It is so good to have grace to strengthen my resolve. God knew we needed this beautiful and powerful Sacrament. Thank you, Lord!

— 3 —

New Evangelist Monthly: Tomorrow, March 2^nd is the first Saturday of the month so it is time for the New Evangelist Monthly round-up. Check out this “informal, dynamic, crowd-sourced “meta-magazine” showcasing the best posts faithful Catholic bloggers publish each month. Here you will find many different, but faithfully Catholic viewpoints, insights and perspectives.”

— 4 —

Spotlight On: Stefanie from A Dreamers Wife blog listed The Veil of Chastity on her February Bloggers in the Spotlight post last week!! I was more than thrilled to be among bloggers like Jen and Hallie!! It was great to meet new friends like Biltrix.

So, I decided to spotlight a fellow blogger each week on my blog. This week, Mrs. Mary Virginia’s blog, Couch of Red is in the spotlight for her 7QTs, mostly because of this hilarious video:

I think anyone with a child who has tried to teach them math will find this funny. God bless all you teachers out there. I have no idea how you do what you do!

— 5 —

NASCAR Rant: Pretty exciting Daytona 500 last Sunday, huh? To be honest, I have become less and less of a NASCAR fan over the years simply because it seems to be so commercialized. They seem to drum up drama just so that they have a story to tell and generate ratings. That is a big turn off for me. But do you know what is really a big turn off to me? The people they allow (hire?) to sing our beautiful National Anthem. They almost always ruin it. Nails down a chalkboard. Ugh.

— 6 —

Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI: I just love him.

— 7 —

The Lord Speaks: Don’t ya just love when the Lord speaks to you just at the right time? This week lesson for me was about showing mercy to others. Just when I needed to learn this lesson, the reading for that day was presented to me:

Holy Gospel of Jesus Christ according to Saint Luke 6:36-38

“Jesus said to his disciples: “Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. Stop judging and you will not be judged. Stop condemning and you will not be condemned. Forgive and you will be forgiven. Give and gifts will be given to you; a good measure, packed together, shaken down, and overflowing, will be poured into your lap. For the measure with which you measure will in return be measured out to you.”

Gulp. Okay, putting my blinders on and minding my own business now!

God love and bless you!

If you have enjoyed my blog, please “like” my Facebook Page, The Veil and sign up to receive my blog posts automatically by clicking the rectangular “Follow” button. Thank you and God Bless!

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary! We are praying for you and your little baby, Jennifer!