True Freedom in Christ

Today is July 4th and it is Independence Day for those of us in America.  The theme of this post is Freedom and is inspired by the testimony of today’s featured guest, Santonio.  Santonio is a FOCUS missionary and former Seminarian who shares his story of how he found freedom in the virtue of Chastity.

As you read his story, know that the Lord desires you to be free.  He desires you to participate in A Sacramental Life in Christ and to accept His Covenant of love and protection.  Know that He, the Holy Spirit, is constantly at work to save you from yourself. Why do I say “save you from yourself”?  Because nothing can come between us (Romans 8:39) and the work of the Holy Spirit….only we can say “Yes.” to Him and “No.” to the continued bondage of sin.

At the same time, Santonio’s testimony reveals that each of us have a ‘thing’ that we must overcome.  Not one creature is exempt from a ‘thing’.  The ‘thing’ is almost always a wound from our past, often from someone in our past.  The Sacraments are designed to heal those wounds and reveal the loving Covenant that awaits us from our Lord.

Here is Santonio’s story.  May you continually accept True Freedom in Christ as we celebrate this Independence Day.

God Love you and Bless you, Cindy

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The journey that I’ve had in my life with Chastity has been quite the struggle. I had been introduced to pornography at the age of 13 from my father and he told me that it’s an instructional video that shows men how to treat woman properly. He also handed me a box of condoms to use up by the end of the month. I thought that by partaking in these things I would obtain happiness because it’s what my father showed me. In addition to that messy situation; my father was hardly around the family he help to create and I thought that by indulging in these then he would want to stick around more. My thought process was that he didn’t love me and the family because he wasn’t around and I was trying to earn his love and earn his stay by doing what he said.
Several years later I entered the seminary. I struggled with Chastity an awful lot and it was due to 5 years of looking at porn as well as the hook up culture I was engulfed in. I would find myself getting better as I received formation from the priest in the seminary, but every time I was growing in Chasity I would fall again. I would fall because of either the memories randomly in my head or because I would listen to rap music or a random video on YouTube and it would trigger me. When I cut out rap music from my life my struggle with Chasity became non-existent and I began thriving.
While still in the seminary, my friends and family back home brought up rap songs for me to listen to whenever I came back home. They would want my opinion on the song because I use to rap in high school. I would continue to listen to rap when I got back to the seminary and when that happened my fall with Chastity creeped back in my life. For me, rap music is lethal to my soul. It encourages me to be edgy in my way of life and encourages drugs (which I did in high school) and encourages an unchaste lifestyle.
I haven’t stopped listening to rap music to this present day and the reason I keep telling myself is because I need it to relate to people. I am a missionary on a college campus and I use it as a tool to make connections with the students just to spark up conversation. Also, when at a party trying to win over a student, knowing the lyrics to a song gives me credentials with them. These days my struggle with Chastity has been less than that, even though I am still engaged in rap. Once I am no longer a missionary my spiritual director has told me to ditch that music for the rest of my life. I will no longer need to use it as a tool to connect with the students.
Porn has had long-lasting effects on my thoughts and the way I view woman. It makes me see the woman first as just an object and “what can I get out of her”, then I see her has a child of God and I see her soul. Lately, in prayer I have been asking God to allow me to see His daughters as children of God first and asking God to banish the evil thoughts from my mind.

My first year as a missionary, I was extremely convicted of the Eucharist and how it truly is the presence of God that we receive in our bodies at mass. One day, I was in prayer and asked God to make me more relatable for the students that I was preparing to encounter on campus. That same day I went to mass and during the Eucharistic prayers/ consecration I began to smell blood. This occurred for 3 consecutive weeks; daily mass and Sunday, but at the moment when I first smelled blood I became depressed and that lasted for 6 weeks. I would’ve never expected for to allow me to become depressed, but that is something I had never experienced before and it definitely made me more relatable.
At the end of week 6 of being depressed I went to mass and during the consecration I began to smell bacon. “I know I’m not crazy” I say to myself. But it was really happening. It made me think of a covenant, the way Scott Hahn spoke of it. He explains a covenant as a boy from a village wanting to marry outside of his village. He approaches his chief and asks for permission to do so. His chief grants that permission and now the boy has to ask the chief from the girl’s village for permission. The chief grants permission so the marriage is on, but before that takes place the two villages enter into a covenant together. They dig a ditch, take a pig, slaughter it in the ditch, and allow the ditch to fill up with blood of the pig. They then step over it and that signifies the covenant being complete and the unification of the two villages into one. If the covenant was somehow broken between the villages then it results in death for someone.
As I go up to receive the Blessed Sacrament and the precious Blood I began to smell sweet bread. I think God was telling me to enter into the covenant with Him and have a piece of heaven which is what the sweet bread resembled. I tell you this because if the Catholic Church has it right when it comes to the Eucharist, then most likely they have all ethical issues correct and most importantly the soul when it encounters sin. This allowed me to definitely fear the Lord in a proper way but also allowed me to draw closer to God and respond with love. And with the love I encountered with God I was running to Him and not being fooled by the evil one with temptations of being unchaste.

p.s.s. Check out all my posts listed by category here!

p.s.s.s.s  I am very interested in hearing from you! Write to me anytime:  theveilofchastity@gmail.com

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Repost ~ Endless Circles

It has been quite a sad and scary week, right?  The kind of week that makes us wonder if God is really “on His throne.”  The readings from today from Isaiah 6 remind us of the vision that the prophet Isaiah had of God:

“I saw the Lord seated on a high and lofty throne….They cried one to the other, “Holy, holy, holy is the LORD of hosts! All the earth is filled with his glory!”” Isaiah 6

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Then, in the Gospel reading, Jesus teaches us:

“Therefore do not be afraid of them. Nothing is concealed that will not be revealed, nor secret that will not be known. And do not be afraid of those who kill the body but cannot kill the soul; rather, be afraid of the one who can destroy both soul and body in Gehenna. Are not two sparrows sold for a small coin? Yet not one of them falls to the ground without your Father’s knowledge. Even all the hairs of your head are counted. So do not be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.”  Matthew 10

How do we reconcile this?  Is God on His throne or is this all one big game of chance?  In today’s Repost from July 2013, I share my thoughts on this nagging question as it relates to our vocation.  Is God intimately involved in every detail and does He lead us to our destiny…… or does He have more of a ‘hands off’ approach?  Can we significantly alter our destination with our choices? It is all very mysterious.  Do I believe in Calvinistic predestination?  No.  Do I believe in the gift of free will?  Absolutely.  Do I believe that God’s hand is in all things?  Yes.  Do I understand how He works?  Not at all.

Finally, know that you have a specific purpose and mission from God, right now.  When you respond in the same way Isaiah responded, “Here I am, send me!” (Isaiah 6:8), your eyes will see “the King, the LORD of hosts!” You will see His hand and know that He is indeed on His throne.

I pray that this Repost fills you with God’s peace, the peace that surpasses all understanding. Phillipians 4:7

Today’s Repost:  Endless Circles

God love you and bless you!

p.s.s. Check out all my posts listed by category here!

p.s.s.s.s  Write to me anytime:  theveilofchastity@gmail.com

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Repost ~ Are You A Priority Or Just An Option?

This Chastity ministry is very rewarding.  I love seeing girls who have written to me in the past go on to find love with men who are good to them and treat them as a priority.  I love corresponding with girls who stumble across my blog after placing “how to get a man to chase you after you have slept with him” in their search engine. To give you an idea of the searches which direct people to my blog, here is a listing from the last 7 days:

 

Search terms

 

It is hard for me to tell girls that this control they desire will fail them.  I often encourage them to ask themselves the question:  Are you are priority or just an option?

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Today’s Saturday Repost is from January 2014.  Are You A Priority Or Just An Option?

I pray, as written in the Song of Solomon, that your beloved is as much yours as you are his.

God love you and bless you!

p.s.s. Check out all my posts listed by category here!

p.s.s.s.s  Write to me anytime:  theveilofchastity@gmail.com

If you have enjoyed my blog, please “like” my Facebook Page, The Veil and sign up to receive my blog posts automatically by clicking the rectangular “Follow” button. Please check me out and follow me on Twitter too! Thank you!

Repost ~ Is He Just Practicing?

Hello!  I am still here, praying for you and enjoying the email exchanges from you each week. When responding to emails, I often include a link to a post in the hopes that it will help the girl writing to me.  This offers me the opportunity to re-read past posts and I often think, “I should repost that!”

So, I will prayerfully choose a blog post to repost each week.  My hope is that you are healed and encouraged through them and that the post reaches a girl who may be searching and in need of advice or encouragement.  We also have many new followers to the blog and I welcome each of you.

Here is the link to:  Is He Just Practicing? which first appeared June 20, 2013.

God love and bless you!

Write to me anytime at:  theveilochastity@gmail.com

If you have enjoyed my blog, please “like” my Facebook Page, The Veil and sign up to receive my blog posts automatically by clicking the rectangular“Follow“ button. Please check me out and follow me on Twitter too! Thank you!

 

2015 in review

Happy New Year! When this ‘Year In Review’ (see below) showed up in my inbox, it inspired me to reach out to you after months of ‘radio silence.’

What is with the silence?  There are several reasons for my drop off in posting.

  1. I ran out of things to write about.  Pretty much everything that I have to share is already contained in the 245 post written over 3 years.  It is as if the Holy Spirit said, “Okay, you are done now.”
  2. I ran out of emotional energy.  I was explaining this to my good friend the other day.  My life, family, friendships and relationships all suddenly demanded a great amount of emotional energy (love really).  All positively directed, but taxing nonetheless.
  3. I am applying my remaining emotional energy to the one-on-one responses to your emails, which I treasure.  Thank you for those of you who write to me.  Know that my ministry is still alive in spite of my lack of posting.

This post is really an Invitation for my past readers and anyone who lands on this page in the future:

~~  Write to me anytime at:  theveilofchastity@gmail.com  ~~

Be assured of my love and prayers for you!

God love and bless you, Cindy

p.s.s. Check out all my posts listed by category here! And check out the Year In Review below.

p.s.s.s You can do a search of the blog by using the Search function on the right side of the page all the way down at the bottom.

Thank you so much for visiting and reading this post! If you have enjoyed my blog, please “like” my Facebook Page, The Veil and sign up to receive my blog posts automatically by clicking the rectangular “Follow” button. Please check me out and follow me on Twitter too!

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2015 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

The Louvre Museum has 8.5 million visitors per year. This blog was viewed about 81,000 times in 2015. If it were an exhibit at the Louvre Museum, it would take about 3 days for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

3 Year Blogiversary!

blogiversary

Today is the 3 year ‘blogiversary’ of The Veil of Chastity!  It is also the feast day of one of my favorite saints, St. Bernard of Clairvaux, followed quickly by St. Monica (Aug 27th) and her son, St. Augustine (Aug 28th) .  I like to call it a Saint ‘Hat Trick’ for those sports girls among us.

St Bernard of ClairveauxSt Monica    St Augustine 1

This week the blog also registered ***over 200,000 hits*** and the most popular post, Stop Chasing Him is responsible for 39,000 of those hits. The best part has been hearing from you and the fact that your emails and comments come in from all over the world. 187 different Countries! What a privilege it has been for me to read each email and comment and then pray for you.  I would have never imagined this 3 years ago.

Thank you so much!

Be assured of my love and prayers for you!

p.s.s. Check out all my posts listed by category here!

p.s.s.s You can do a search of the blog by using the Search function on the right side of the page all the way down at the bottom.

p.s.s.s.s.s.s  Write to me anytime at:  theveilofchastity@gmail.com

Thank you so much for visiting and reading this post! If you have enjoyed my blog, please “like” my Facebook Page, The Veil and sign up to receive my blog posts automatically by clicking the rectangular “Follow” button. Please check me out and follow me on Twitter too!

True Freedom

Today is July 4th and it is Independence Day for those of us in America.  The theme of this post is True Freedom and in this Summer Rerun series I did a search for the word “Freedom” on the blog and found several posts from the past discussing Freedom…..true Freedom….Freedom in Christ.

True Freedom

Posts About Freedom

The first post I found is called “Freedom In Self-Control” where I share the words of Dietrich von Hildebrand.

“…As our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit and we are made in the image of God, we are told to glorify God with our bodies. The body is of great worth in Christianity. God came to us in flesh and blood and revealed how important the body is to the human condition. Within our bodies we have many passions. Either we are able to control them or they will control us. Freedom is found by self-control….”  

Dietrich von Hildebrand

The next post is called “Does God ‘Take Away’ Our Desires?” which was written in response to a question about why God does not immediately and automatically take away our desires.

“…In my experience, God does not take things from us when we are tightly gripping on to them.  Instead, when we live a Sacramental life of grace, He sort of ‘heats things up’ so that we feel it burning in our hands and let go of it on our own…”

The next freedom post is from July 4, 2014 which has 7QTs full of freedom thoughts, including this from our Catechism:

   “The more one does what is good, the freer one becomes. There is no true freedom except in the service of what is good and just. The choice to disobey and do evil is an abuse of freedom and leads to “the slavery of sin.” ….By deviating from the moral law man violates his own freedom, becomes imprisoned within himself, disrupts neighborly fellowship, and rebels against divine truth.” 

The Catechism of The Catholic Church:  Freedom; Paragraphs #1733 and #1740

Mass With Healing Prayers

We have been attending Mass with Healing Prayers over the last year or so. These take place one time a month in our area.  The evening Mass follows a healing prayer service where several priests pray over us during Eucharistic Adoration of our Lord. Every priest has the charism of healing (see Acts 5:15 “Thus they even carried the sick out into the streets and laid them on cots and mats so that when Peter came by, at least his shadow might fall on one or another of them.”)  A Charism is: any good gift that flows from God’s love to humans.

I have received healing in the form of Freedom from these Healing Prayer services.  If you have a chance to attend these, I highly recommend them. Of course, every Mass is an opportunity for Healing and the gateway to freedom.

Books About Freedom:

I am reading a book right now called Unbound by Neal Lozano.  Soooo good! There is a Catholic version which I have on order and can’t wait to receive.  It is called:  Resisting the Devil: A Catholic Perspective on Deliverance

God bless you with True Freedom!

p.s.s. Check out all my posts listed by category here!

p.s.s.s You can do a search of the blog by using the Search function on the right side of the page all the way down at the bottom.

p.s.s.s.s.s.s  Write to me anytime at:   theveilofchastity@gmail.com

Thank you so much for visiting and reading this post! If you have enjoyed my blog, please “like” my Facebook Page, The Veil and sign up to receive my blog posts automatically by clicking the rectangular “Follow” button. Please check me out and follow me on Twitter too!

Feeling The Effects

I can tell by your emails that you are feeling the effects of the fall of mankind.  In this Summer Rerun series I chose a post which hopefully explains why you are struggling. I attempt to explain why we women are so vulnerable to Fantasy Relationships and why some men have such an incredible power over us.

Here is the Post:  He Will Rule Over You

I pray this post blesses you.  Be assured of my prayers and write to me anytime at theveilofchastity@gmail.com

God love you and bless you! Cindy

p.s.s. Check out all my posts listed by category here!

Thank you so much for visiting and reading this post! If you have enjoyed my blog, please “like” my Facebook Page, The Veil and sign up to receive my blog posts automatically by clicking the rectangular “Follow” button. Please check me out and follow me on Twitter too!

The Book of Tobit

Have you been enjoying this week’s first readings from the book of Tobit? Tomorrow’s reading reveals the marriage of Tobiah and Sarah.  This holy Old Testament book has everything:

“…fidelity to the law, intercessory function of angels, piety toward parents, purity of marriage, reverence for the dead, and the value of almsgiving, prayer, and fasting..”

It is funny because I have been thinking of doing a Summer “Rerun” series where I recycle posts from the past.  This is a perfect way to kick it off!  Enjoy this recycled post and the wonderful book of Tobit!

The Archangel Raphael escorts Tobias to Media

The Archangel Raphael escorts Tobias to Media

~ Originally Posted October 19, 2012

Does God Arrange Marriage?

Today, my husband and I celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary.  In my book, I share my path through singleness.  I also share the story of how God arranged for me and Gregg, my Holy Spouse, to meet and marry. 

The premise of my book and of this blog is the idea that we are all covered by a veil and that only our Holy Spouse can see us.  All other suitors will reject us because they cannot fully see us. 

I define our Holy Spouse as the one that God intends for us to marry.  Given that definition, it is clear that I believe God arranges marriages.  Is there any biblical evidence to support my belief?  Let’s look at the Book of Tobit.

Book of Tobit

This is a beautiful story of God’s healing power and His providential hand in marriage. Goodness me, there are so many great lessons in this divinely inspired book!  I will only be able to cover  the highlights but I hope these fascinating events build your faith and confidence in God’s intimate and tender care for us……..

Please go here to read the full post.

Write to me anytime and be assured of my prayers. theveilofchastity@gmail.com

God love and bless you!

Cindy

p.s.s. Check out all my posts listed by category here!

Thank you so much for visiting and reading this post! If you have enjoyed my blog, please “like” my Facebook Page, The Veil and sign up to receive my blog posts automatically by clicking the rectangular “Follow” button. Please check me out and follow me on Twitter too!

He’s Getting Married Tomorrow

I woke up early this morning after emailing with a girl last night whose ex is getting married today.  Ah, those Friday nights before ‘his’ wedding.  I remember them well.

This is the advice I gave her:

  Keep breathing through the pain and tears. Talk yourself through it and reassure yourself it is going to be alright. Your pillow will be wet with tears tonight but there will be a Friday night in your future where you will feel excited for your wedding day.

   I also recommend you share your feelings with God. He can handle it and your honesty is part of firming up your lifelong dependence on Him. I have a scripture verse I would like you to read tonight: Ephesians chapter 6:10-20.”

 Everything will be alright

Keep Breathing

The pain can be excruciating when your ex marries another girl.  Like giving birth to a new life without the hope of him in it, you must keep breathing thorough it.  You may, at times, experience the rolling waves of hyperventilation in your chest.  No doubt, tears will flow.  But, just keep breathing.  The morning will come and new hope will replace the hopelessness you feel.

This morning there are two funerals being held for locals in their early 40’s.  I don’t know their circumstances but I do know that one of them hung herself.  Why?  We don’t know.  All we are left with is the fact that morning and new hope did not come and instead “the flaming arrows of the evil one” did not appear to be extinguished.

Ephesians 6

During our bible study on Thursday night, we discussed Ephesians 6.  I noticed that the Lord’s expectations of us are pretty high.  He doesn’t just expect us to cruise through life in the hopes that theflaming arrows” will not defeat us.  No, He expects us to put on armor” and fight.”  He expects us to stand strong” and use our “shields.”  He expects us to pray and send our petitions”/requests/needs to Him.  He expects us to “be alert”,  to have “done everything” and “stand firm.”  If we do, He promises to protect us.

The Armor of God

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places. 

Therefore, take up the full armor of God, so that you will be able to resist in the evil day, and having done everything, to stand firm Stand firm therefore, having girded your loins with truth, and having put on the breastplate of righteousness, and having shod your feet with the preparation of the gospel of peace; in addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.

With all prayer and petition pray at all times in the Spirit, and with this in view, be on the alert with all perseverance and petition for all the saints, and pray on my behalf, that utterance may be given to me in the opening of my mouth, to make known with boldness the mystery of the gospel, for which I am an ambassador in chains; that in proclaiming it I may speak boldly, as I ought to speak.”  Ephesians 6:10-20

Your Weapons

“…the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God.”

Many interpret the “Word of God” to mean that we are to just read the Holy Scriptures.  No doubt we are to read them but at the time that St. Paul wrote Ephesians, most of the New Testament had not been written or decided upon.  Paul was referring to The Word, Jesus.

The Word Became Flesh

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.…” 

John 1:1

Your weapon is the Grace that comes from the Lamb of God Who takes away the sins of the world.  Jesus, The Word who became flesh.  The gateway to grace is the Sacraments.  I cannot encourage you enough to stay close to God by living a Sacramental life in Christ.  The Sacraments are your weapons which extinguish the flaming arrows of the evil one.  They are the “having done everything” in God’s expectations and referred to in Ephesians 6:13. 

Talk Yourself Through It

Self-talk may sound silly to some.  But if your singleness is extended far beyond where you had hoped or if the one you still love is getting married to someone else, self-talk is a powerful skill.  It is a type of inner prayer of confirmation.  Tell yourself it will be alright.  Tell yourself that there is hope and there will be a spark in your natural curiosity for what will happen in the future.  What plan does the Lord have for you?  Could it be that He is preparing the way for something you can’t even imagine right now?

Preparing The Way

The “lifelong dependency” I referenced is the beautiful work that God does in our life.  He heals us, draws us to Him and makes us dependent upon Him.  The beautiful work is done most effectively through the pain we experience in the letting go.  The beautiful work is accomplished by breathing through the pain, arming ourselves with His truth and Sacraments and then talking ourselves through it.

My extended singleness was part of that beautiful work.  It was a gift.  It was a sweet time of mercy and healing and dependency.  Did I feel that at the time? No.  It is only something I can only look back and see.  Never did I imagine I would thank Him for that time alone, together, which taught me to put on the armor of God, stand firm, seek truth, use my weapons, pray and extinguish the flaming arrows of the evil one.

The Lord is preparing and strengthening you to do the same.  Keep breathing, talk yourself through it, live a Sacramental life and trust that He is doing a beautiful work through it all.

Write to me anytime and be assured of my prayers. theveilofchastity@gmail.com

God love and bless you! Cindy

p.s.s. Check out all my posts listed by category here!

Thank you so much for visiting and reading this post! If you have enjoyed my blog, please “like” my Facebook Page, The Veil and sign up to receive my blog posts automatically by clicking the rectangular “Follow” button. Please check me out and follow me on Twitter too!