“The more our bodies and our souls sing the same song, whose notes were written by the Creator, the better the chance that the two complementary sexes will create beautiful music.”
Dr. Alice von Hildebrand
Man and Woman ~ A Divine Invention
I know the idea that attraction is purely physical is cemented into most of our minds because of our culture’s obsession with obtaining physical perfection. But, it is a lie. In the first part of this myth buster, I discussed the problem of having our body and our souls disconnected. I touched on how important it is to have harmony between our body and our souls and how this harmony enables us to properly relate to the opposite sex.
A critical goal for all of us to achieve is to reharmonize and merge our body and our soul. Today I will present ideas for obtaining this harmony through the healing of our spiritual soul and taking care of our physical body with a balanced approach.
Remember disharmony will occur when you emphasize one aspect of yourselves more than the other. This emphasis will cause you to attract and be attracted to men who also emphasize that one aspect of you. In other words, if you emphasize and focus on your body, then the men you date will do the same. If you emphasize your soul at the expense of your body, then the men will potentially only feel a sisterly affection toward you rather than spousal love. It is important to be in balance so that you, the whole person, can love and be loved.
Only In Heaven
“The body, formed in the image of God, and the soul, which has adopted the Spirit of the Father, in harmony, make up the perfect human being.”
Saint Irenaeus (2nd Century)
I don’t want to mislead you into thinking that you will not be able to attract your husband until you have your body and soul perfectly merged. None of us will be perfectly harmonized until we are in heaven! But this should not discourage us from making a serious effort toward this goal right now. You definitely want to be ready when you do meet your husband. So, what can you do in the meantime?
When approaching dating and marriage, you must think long-term. Remember the one that God has for you is looking for a person, not just a body. So, don’t allow yourself to focus on your body. And don’t allow a man to marry you for your physical attractiveness. This is a huge risk. I cannot tell you how many times I have witnessed this pattern: Guy falls for the attractive, sexually available girl, they have sex, they get married (or they break up), they contracept, they divorce. This is the future vacuum discussed the first part of this myth buster.
You may feel very flattered to have a guy fall all over you because of your physical appearance but you must not allow yourself to be sucked in to this type of relationship. One strategy for protecting yourself from this type of relationship is……Chastity!
Chastity is the force that pulls the body and the soul into union and creates the fullness of the intimacy of persons so they can love and be loved.
“Seeing each other, as if through the mystery of creation, man and woman see each other even more fully and distinctly than through the sense of sight itself, that is, through the eyes of the body. They see and know each other with all the peace of the interior gaze, which creates precisely the fullness of the intimacy of persons.”
Blessed Pope John Paul II, Theology of the Body 13:1
Chastity allows you to keep your head on straight in the relationship so that you can accurately judge the quality and direction of the relationship. It allows your body and your soul to sing the same song and make beautiful music with your husband!
Take Care of Your Body
We all need to strike a balance when it comes to taking care of our bodies. Your body, no matter how flawed you think it may be, is a miraculous gift from God. We must take care of all our gifts, including our bodies. We should never feel hatred toward our body. But, we must also not go overboard and make our bodies an idol.
Exercise and eating right are important. If you happen to struggle with gluttony (most humans do), then add to your daily prayer list a fervent request to be released from that bondage. I have certainly had to add it to my prayer list! And I can say it definitely helps so use this powerful tool!
Your physical attributes can be easily enhanced by good hygiene habits. I have very simple advice for you when it comes to taking care of yourself physically: Don’t smoke (smoking wreaks havoc on your skin and your teeth!), drink lots of water and for heaven sakes use SPF, moisturize and exfoliate your skin! Seriously, that is it!
If you are already doing all these things to enhance your natural physical attributes, then start to evaluate your soul.
I finally realized that taking care of my soul was key to having a healthy relationship with my body. Once I returned to the Catholic Church and started living a prayerful and Sacramental Life, my body and my soul started to merge. The merger is still taking place today and requires constant prayer.
Take Care Of Your Soul
Your soul needs grace because grace is the only medicine that heals us and brings us into harmony. Here are our resources to the fount of grace:
- Receive the Precious body, blood, soul and divinity of Jesus in the Eucharist
- Eucharistic Adoration
- Read Holy Scripture
- Read Holy Blogs and books
- Only participate in holy Conversations
- Protect your mind from media that further severs your body from your soul
- Commit to Chastity
- Pray the Divine Mercy Chaplet
- Pray daily and lay your needs before the Lord
- Thank the Lord for your body, your health and your fertility
- Attend a Healing Mass
- Consecration yourself to Jesus through Mary (Louis de Montfort’s Total Consecration to Mary)
Take care of your body and your soul. Have a balanced approach. Seek healing from the Lord. Participate in His merging plan for you. Keep your body and soul harmonized with prayer, Chastity and a sacramental life of grace. Then, wait on the Lord.
God love and bless you!
One surprise I hope you all will look forward to is Gregg’s input on this topic. Next week, he will provide his experience concerning this myth from a guy’s point of view. I will be doing the typing but the post will be from him. So stay tuned!
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